i n s a n e . s a v i o u r s

zotggi's Guide to Getting Laid

2011-03-03T12:30:00.002+08:00

For some reason this picture's too big for FB. So i'm posting here instead and setting up the link.

Please try this for us yuda.

DRONG Has Left The Game.

2010-10-05T09:55:00.003+08:00

Dr Ong is said to have had a complaint filed against him to the board of governors, but he did not want to respond to 'allegations'.

IN A surprise move, Dr Ong Teck Chin, 61, the principal of Anglo-Chinese School (Independent), has resigned from the school he has headed since 1994.

'I have done a lot for ACS and I want to move on,' he said.

Man Drinks Pint of Vodka in Four Seconds, Dies

2010-09-30T09:53:00.006+08:00

A 29-year-old in Teeside, Englanddowned a pint glass full of vodka while drinking with friends. Shortly thereafter, he was found not breathing in a pool of his own blood and later died.

His friend tried to stop his chug:

Mr Davies' best friend Christopher Crooks told the inquest how he tried to save his life after he was found unconscious in the early hours of 16 January.
In a statement read out by deputy Teesside coroner Tony Eastwood, he said: "Richard drank a pint of vodka in four seconds or so.
"I did try to take the glass off him, but he turned his back on me, pushed me away, and drank it all."

To avoid the catastrophe, please drink it in 3 seconds kerkie.....

Chelsea geena pwns u

2010-09-27T09:24:00.001+08:00

An Initiative by Mr A to the Z

2010-09-20T23:22:00.003+08:00

For more excuses, please log-on to: www.1001excuses.sg

Save the Trees

2010-09-11T14:35:00.001+08:00

What you looking at?

Facebook GF Finder

2010-09-02T11:21:00.001+08:00

Az's Angels

2010-08-29T16:51:00.002+08:00

But which one is his favourite? Who will be The One?

Stay tuned.

Thanks to our mystery spotter for the lead.

LEFT 4 DEAD THE MOVIE

2010-08-11T00:34:00.004+08:00

Starring:

Chong Jiarming as Bill

Shen Aozhi as Boomer

Kerk Chee Wee as Hunter

Who will prevail?

I Wanna Play a Game

2010-07-25T14:12:00.000+08:00

Mong Huan Bo 2010

2010-06-12T01:53:00.005+08:00

i...can give you gatsbyyy~~~

Intended!

2010-06-04T21:49:00.002+08:00

How to SAGGF 101

2010-05-30T00:21:00.001+08:00

FAILBLOG!

2010-05-27T14:00:00.001+08:00

and Slipknot Bassist is dead..."Slipknot come again I oong" sugz

SWBWEWSW

2010-05-18T15:14:00.003+08:00

Man Having Sex With Iron Bench Almost Loses His Penis

The Curse of the Jersey Continues...

2010-05-17T18:57:00.001+08:00

Germany captain Michael Ballack has been ruled out of the World Cup finals with an ankle injury, the German Football Federation have confirmed.

The 33-year-old Chelsea midfielder underwent an MRI in Munich this morning to assess the damage suffered in Saturday's FA Cup final, and the scan showed ligament damage to his right ankle.

Ballack was injured following a heavy challenge from Portsmouth's Kevin-Prince Boateng in the Blues' 1-0 win at Wembley and is expected to be out of action for eight weeks.

"National team captain Michael Ballack is out of the 2010 World Cup in South Africa. This is the result of an MRI on Monday morning in Munich," read a statement from the DFB this morning.

"A tear of the medial collateral ligament of the right ankle was found. The right ankle is immobilised in a plaster. He will have to wear a special shoe for two weeks.

"After the diagnosis of national team doctor Hans-Wilhelm Muller-Wohlfahrt today, a complete healing of the injury is expected. Ballack's return to training is possible at the earliest in eight weeks."

The news will come as a massive blow to Germany coach Joachim Low.

Before the diagnosis was known, he told www.dfb.de: "When we found out about the injury on Saturday we were all very concerned. We had no accurate picture of what had happened.

"The good news is that nothing is broken.

"But he has a lot of pain and is restricted in his movement.

"We need clarity but we obviously hope the injury proves to be nothing serious.

"Michael is our captain and one of our leading players."

P/S - FUCK THIS SHITE

SBES Food

2010-05-12T01:53:00.003+08:00

Beer Pager Helps You Find Your Lost Beer

2010-04-30T15:43:00.004+08:00

Lost beer is a serious problem. The longer it remains lost, the warmer it gets and the less drunk you are. Plus, the drunker you get, the easier it is to lose your beer. The Beer Pager will let you know where your beer is at all times and will emit a belching sound from up to 60 feet away through walls.

We’ve all had some woozy memories of those pleasantly hectic hours we spent at a friend’s bachelor party or at some overgrown birthday bash, when the level of alcohol just happens to exceed that of the legit limit. In such times, the probability of misplacing a can of beer can be as much of a sin as much as it is a possibility.

The Beer Pager is available now for just under $20 and will stop beer loss in it’s tracks. Because as long as you have beer, everything is right with the world.

MIA III: A(z) Leopard Never Changes Its Spots

2010-04-29T03:45:00.002+08:00

zotggi theme song

2010-04-28T22:35:00.004+08:00

"someday, love will finddddd youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu"

Enjoy. T_T

Compliments,
Foong,
Club Zotggi

Part-Time Gay for Pay, Full-Time SC2, Forever ZOT GGI

2010-04-22T18:02:00.002+08:00

From ZOT GGI to GL HF

2010-03-29T00:45:00.001+08:00

/S Shall Officially be Renamed HMC

2010-03-13T14:18:00.002+08:00

Muscle March Protein Power Nintendo Wii video game

2010-01-30T16:08:00.002+08:00

A race to recover your protein power in this video game. Namco's barely clothed and amazingly quirky downloadable WiiWare title "Muscle March" is coming to North America this winter.

The muscular mini-game has players chasing after a protein powder thief, with Wii Remote and Nunchuk motions used to match the thief's pose after he blasts through a wall. When players finally near said thief, they shake the Remote and Nunchuk to tackle him.

Ooohh Yeahhh

2010-01-15T03:06:00.001+08:00

Do or Die...Make Your Choice....

2010-01-13T17:33:00.002+08:00

THE PULL - A Speed Drink Dating Party
Thursday, January 14th, 2010, 9pm to 3am
FASH, The Butter Factory
with DJ DREM (Old School R&B)
Guest CJ’s (Cupid Jockeys) Langan & Andrew “Handsome” T

Still looking for that special someone? Welcome to “The Pull”. We’re bringing you our own twist on speed-dating, meets business networking, meets general merrymaking at your favorite neighborhood watering hole The Butter Factory.

Sick of going to a club so packed and loud that you couldn't have a proper conversation with someone? Spotted a cutie by the bar surrounded by 10 friends and you're too shy to walk over? Hate the possibility of the embarrassment of being brushed off or ignored?

We take the awkwardness out of approaching that cute guy or girl you really wanted to speak/flirt/dance with.

Let our cupids do the work.

THE RULES OF THE PULL

1) “The Pull” starts promptly at 9pm, and ends at 3am

2) All guys must reserve a table to participate in the matchmaking - you don't want to keep the girls standing would you?

Ladies - You're welcome to reserve tables too!

High tables & Round tables - minimum spend of 1 bottle - Groups of 3 people max
Sofa tables - minimum spend 2 bottles – Groups of 6 people max
Tables must be claimed by 1045pm latest

3) Ladies get in free and will be introduced to guys at the tables by our cupids.

Ladies that have reserved tables can get our cupid to introduce guys to them too.

4) Ladies - you've got to be sporting and sit down for at least one drink with all guys introduced to by cupids. Once you're done with that drink you can stay for another or move on. Some excuses to keep handy: "My girlfriend has an emergency that requires my help - with the bathroom!", "I need to go and wash my hair now!"

Guys - You need to purchase a non-alcoholic beverage for the girl if she doesn't want an alcoholic beverage - it's only polite!

If the guy would like to know any of the girls better, ask for her number silly! If you're too shy you can tell our cupid and we will ask on your behalf, if the girl consents, cupid will bring her back to the table.

Girls - the same applies! If you want to know the guys better just ask away. We're equal opportunity here at The Pull!

5) Ladies on the dancefloor are off limits. If you don’t want cupid near you, keep dancing!

Free Entry for Ladies
Cover Charge $15 for Guys OR Table Booking

email natasha@massive.sg for table bookings

Yours Sincerely,

President ZOT GGI

Guess who's this

2009-12-26T14:59:00.001+08:00

Clue: Fellow ACSIAN

/S is Now Your Official Blog for Sexual Health

2009-12-16T01:11:00.002+08:00

Premature ejaculation hits one in three S'pore men

AS MANY as one in three men in Singapore could be suffering from premature ejaculation (PE), according to a study.
PE, a devastating condition for a man, is defined as a lack of control on a man's part during intercourse, resulting in ejaculation prior to or within one minute of penetration, said Associate Professor George Lee Eng Geap from the University of Malaya and Monash University.
Although the poll did not include Singapore, Prof Lee, who is part of the study's steering committee, said: "We believe the results to be applicable to Singapore, because a similar study done in Europe in 2007 also showed a similar result. PE is a problem that cuts across ethnicity and age groups."
The Asia-Pacific Premature Ejaculation Prevalence And Attitude Study surveyed nearly 5,000 men, aged 18 to 65, from 10 Asia-Pacific countries, including China, Australia, New Zealand, Thailand, South Korea and Malaysia.
The causes of the problem are complex, ranging from the psychological to the physiological, said Prof Lee.
A person who secretly had intercourse at home, and was anxious of being found out by his parents, for instance, could develop PE later in life, he said.
The problem could also be genetic in nature, he added.
There may be a solution: American company Janssen-Cilag has recently submitted its medication, Dapoxetine, to the health authorities here for review.
The pill is the only known medication that can treat the condition and is currently available in seven European Union countries, including Sweden, Austria and Italy. Outside of Europe, the medicine is available only in New Zealand and South Korea.
Dapoxetine is supposed to boost the ejaculation-delaying hormone serotonin, by preventing or delaying the breakdown of serotonin in the body. In effect, this would help maintain higher levels of the hormone in the body, which would in turn help to delay ejaculation.
Other treatments for PE include behavioural therapy like counselling, or topical treatments like sprays, numbing gels or condoms. However, there are drawbacks to some of these treatments. For example, numbing gel or sprays can desensitise the penis, causing a loss of sexual enjoyment, said Prof Lee.
The condition can seriously injure a man's relationship with his partner. "PE can have a devastating impact on the relationship between men and their partners," said Prof Lee.
"The impact extends not just to a man's self-esteem, but also to a woman's fulfillment and, ultimately, to the entire relationship."

Looking at Breasts is Healthy

2009-11-04T16:05:00.003+08:00

10 Minutes Of Staring at Breasts Daily Prolongs Man's Life by 5 Years

According to German research published in New England Journal of Medicine, men staring at women's breasts in fact prolong their lives with years.

"Just 10 minutes of looking at the charms of a well-endowed females is equivalent to a 30-minute aerobics work-out," said author Dr. Karen Weatherby, a gerontologist.

The team led by Weatherby was made up of researchers at three hospitals in Frankfurt, Germany, and found this results after monitoring for 5 years the health of 200 male subjects, half of whom were asked to look at busty females daily, while the other half had to abstain from doing so.

For five years, the breasts oglers presented a lower blood pressure, slower resting pulse rates and decreased risk of coronary artery disease.

"Sexual excitement gets the heart pumping and improves blood circulation. There's no question: Gazing at large breasts makes men healthier. Our study indicates that engaging in this activity a few minutes daily cuts the risk of stroke and heart attack in half." said Weatherby, who even recommends that men aged over 40 should spend at least 10 minutes daily admiring breasts sized "D-cup" or larger.

Well, men, look at breasts, then:

It's a Dragon, It's a Snake, NO! It's.....

2009-10-31T10:30:00.002+08:00

Can't get enough of this game

2009-10-13T15:44:00.002+08:00

CHO ANIKI!!!!

a gem of a picture

2009-09-23T00:18:00.006+08:00

JX rightfully points out in the pic:

seriously, what are the chances of FOONG not having his hands on his waist while playing soccer (and everyone else having theirs)? haha, check out uncle john showing some skin

don't you miss those match days?

Wear Sunscreen

2009-09-03T17:38:00.005+08:00

Since this site is so dead, thought I'll post something up.

This might be a little late for our graduation, but chanced upon this last night and just wanted to share with you guys. We probably all heard this in the song, but think we were too young to properly appreciate it. Anyway here goes boys.

"Ladies and gentlemen of the class of '97: Wear sunscreen.

If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long-term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience. I will dispense this advice now.

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Oh, never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they've faded. But trust me, in 20 years, you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked. You are not as fat as you imagine.

Don't worry about the future. Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind, the kind that blindside you at 4 p.m. on some idle Tuesday.

Do one thing every day that scares you.

Sing.

Don't be reckless with other people's hearts. Don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.

Floss.

Don't waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long and, in the end, it's only with yourself.

Remember compliments you receive. Forget the insults. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how.

Keep your old love letters. Throw away your old bank statements.

Stretch.

Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives. Some of the most interesting 40-year-olds I know still don't.

Get plenty of calcium. Be kind to your knees. You'll miss them when they're gone.

Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either. Your choices are half chance. So are everybody else's.

Enjoy your body. Use it every way you can. Don't be afraid of it or of what other people think of it. It's the greatest instrument you'll ever own.

Dance, even if you have nowhere to do it but your living room.

Read the directions, even if you don't follow them.

Do not read beauty magazines. They will only make you feel ugly.

Get to know your parents. You never know when they'll be gone for good. Be nice to your siblings. They're your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.

Understand that friends come and go, but with a precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle, because the older you get, the more you need the people who knew you when you were young.

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard. Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.

Travel.

Accept certain inalienable truths: Prices will rise. Politicians will philander. You, too, will get old. And when you do, you'll fantasize that when you were young, prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders.

Respect your elders.

Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund. Maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse. But you never know when either one might run out.

Don't mess too much with your hair or by the time you're 40 it will look 85.

Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia. Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it's worth.

But trust me on the sunscreen."

(Chicago Tribune: 01/06/97)" - Mary Schmich

Best Games Ever

2009-08-21T16:07:00.002+08:00

Must haves for Team ZOTGGI

Happy 10th Year Anniversary!!!

2009-08-17T01:04:00.000+08:00

SOS

2009-07-10T01:07:00.000+08:00

It has reached tipping point. Someone save yd!

sagbd

To All SAGGFs

2009-06-19T14:19:00.000+08:00

Please use only Durex.

Don't Celebrate Father's Day so soon =)

MEGAN FOX IS A MAN

2009-06-09T16:04:00.002+08:00

LOS ANGELES, CA – The internet has been abuzz since this Sunday’s Golden Globes ceremony, where Megan Fox jokingly remarked that she looked like a man.

When interviewed on the red carpet, she said “I look like Alan Alda in drag. I’m a tranny. I’m a man.”

At the time, reporters passed it off as a jovial attempt to cover for her nerves.

However, today she has cleared the air and officially reported: she’s really a man.

Megan Fox was born Mitchell Reed Fox in Rockwood, Tennessee. From an early age, Mitchell showed an interest in both performing and women’s clothing. When having a preacher lay hands on him did not ‘cure’ him of these interests, his parents simply put him on the pageant circuit.

By the age of 13, Mitchell had already started a career as a female child performer called ‘Megan Fox’. Making her debut on an Olsen Twins straight-to-video release, the twins have kept his secret all this time.

As a sweet 16 present, Fox’s parents offered him sexual reassignment surgery, which, given their child’s career, they’d hoped to write off as a business expense. Unfortunately laws prohibit such surgery to be done to minors.

Since then Megan has been working non-stop, and been included on many Hottest Women lists in publications around the world.

Megan, as she goes by now exclusively, also noted this Sunday how much she wants Salma Hayek’s figure. She has even scheduled surgery later this month to get it. After the two met in New York this week, Hayek offered to have a cast made of her bust so doctors can match them exactly on Megan Fox’s chest.

The internet is already speculating whether this news will be worked into the plot of the upcoming Transformers sequel.

http://weeklyworldnews.com/celebs/4783/megan-fox-is-a-man/

Kerk shirts

2009-05-30T20:26:00.003+08:00

kerk t-shirts

You really cannot make this stuff up man. Fact is stranger than fiction.

i wanna play a game

2009-05-04T00:09:00.001+08:00

nothing but united

Mugging the SMU way

2009-04-11T12:48:00.005+08:00

the official saggf game. (due to a massive increase in ky's msn and facebook friend requests y chais, he has requested for the picture to be edited so that his email is removed. This proves mafia wars' the saggf game beyond conclusion.)

Dear John

2009-03-22T18:43:00.002+08:00

this is just for you

if you want tickets, let me know asap. looking forward to seeing snake at chijmes :)

And they say...

2009-03-21T15:14:00.003+08:00

a picture paints a thousand words

SAGGF1001

2009-03-17T23:41:00.004+08:00

SAGGF #351: Be a Musician

SAGGF #351a - Don't play the bass

DMC + EPL Pwnage OMGWTFBBQ

2009-03-16T22:18:00.004+08:00

SATSUGAIIIII SATSUGAIIII SEYOOO!!!!!!!!!

Host is RAPERAPERAPERAPERAPERAPERAPERAPERAPE!!

Liverpool is RAPERAPERAPERAPERAPERAPERAPERAPERAPERAPERAPERAPERAPERAPERAPE!!

Goals Galore!

2009-03-08T16:50:00.005+08:00

Team /S 10 (yoon,les,ky x2,yd x2,nic x2,hw x2) - 2 (les,doctor#41) Team Medicine

Once again...TOO EASY for /S...5 goals in the 1st half and 5 goals in the 2nd half sealed the win. Fernando Torles "scored" for Team /S with an intended goal and a few intended assists and in the 2nd half, put on the medicine jersey to score a half-field Xabi Alonso lob...what a traitor!

Side-Quest

"I'm gonna score hat-trick.", Foong
"If u score hat-trick I zotggi for the next 10 yrs", yd
"me too", ky

Final Score:
yd - 2 goals
ky - 2 goals
foong - 0 goals

SAGGF1001: How to make a woman happy.... the point system

2009-03-04T17:17:00.000+08:00

How to make a woman happy.... the point system

In the world of romance, one single rule applies:

Make the woman happy. Do something she likes, and you get points. Do something she dislikes and points are subtracted.

You don't get any points for doing something she expects. Sorry,that's the way the game is played.

Here is a guide to the point system:

SIMPLE DUTIES
You make the bed (+1)
You make the bed, but forget the decorative pillow(0)
You throw the bedspread over rumpled sheets (-1) You go out to buy her what she wants (+5) In the rain (+8)
But return with Beer (-5)

You check out a suspicious noise at night (0)
You check out a suspicious noise, and it is nothing(0)
You check out a suspicious noise and it is something (+5)
You pummel it with iron rod (+10)
It's her pet (-10)

SOCIAL ENGAGEMENTS
You stay by her side the entire party (0)
You stay by her side for a while, then leave to chat with a
college buddy(-2)
Named Tina (-4)
Tina is a dancer (-6)
Tina has silicon implants (-80)

HER BIRTHDAY
You take her out to dinner (0)
You take her out to dinner and it's not a sports bar (+1)
Okay, it's a sports bar (-2)
And it's all-you-can-eat night(-3)
It's a sports bar, it's all-you-can-eat night, and your face is painted the colors of your favorite team (-10)

A NIGHT OUT
You take her to a movie (+2)
You take her to a movie she likes (+4)
You take her to a movie you hate (+6)
You take her to a movie you like (-2)
It's called 'DeathCop' (-3)
You lied and said it was a foreign film about orphans (-15)

YOUR PHYSIQUE
You develop a noticeable potbelly (-15)
You develop a noticeable potbelly and exercise to get rid of it (+10)
You develop a noticeable potbelly and resort to baggy jeans and baggy Hawaiian shirts (-30)
You say, "It doesn't matter, you have one too." (-8000)

ENJOY THE BIG QUESTION
She asks, "Do I look fat?" (-5) [Yes, you lose points no matter what]
You hesitate in responding (-10)
You reply, "Where?" (-35)
Any other response (-20)

COMMUNICATION
When she wants to talk about a problem , you listen, displaying what looks like a concerned expression (0)
You listen, for over 30 minutes (+50)
You listen for more than 30 minutes without looking at the TV (+500)
She realizes this is because you have fallen asleep (-10000)

Wanksohard

2009-03-03T05:12:00.003+08:00

Was talking online to a friend, and somehow, this seemed very funny at 5am.

A young deaf-mute couple gets married. At first, they have sex with the lights on, in order to sign to each other.

One day, the woman asks, "Can we try to make love with the lights off?"

The man says, "OK, but how will you know when I want to make love?"

The woman says, "Well, when you're in the mood, just shake my left breast once, and I'll know. If you don't want to, shake my right breast once."

The man says, "All right. And, if you want to make love to me, shake my penis once. But, if you don't want to make love to me, shake my penis about 50 times!"

/S dead.

2009-02-27T00:43:00.001+08:00

So so so sad. T_T

TOO EASY

2009-02-13T01:35:00.009+08:00

Happy Valentine's Day!

what? you need a date?

just dial 1900-T-O-O-E-A-S-Y and our resident Love ~~Gollum~~ Guru will teach you the 5 simple steps required only for SG$69.69(no GST!):

S-A-G-G-F: easy as 1-2-3-4-5 (Source: Facebook)

remember, V-day is meant to celebrate friendships too! Left 4 Dead/Half-life anyone? :D

cheers

SAGGF +++

2009-02-03T21:19:00.002+08:00

Names shall not be disclosed. If you do not know, it means your nahz-o-meter is going up.

Seems like the "Economy" is recovering

Life is much simpler as a Sausage

2009-01-21T11:05:00.006+08:00

Hello boys. 2nd post ever and it's proudly supplied by the Witch.

ZOT GGI PTE LTD

2009-01-18T17:29:00.003+08:00

As a result of the economic downturn, we regret to inform the public that we shall freeze our headcount and are considering retrenching staff. Please do not submit your applications anymore. Our subsidiary company, SAGGF PTE LTD, is however, still looking for talented individuals to bring the organization, /S Group, to greater heights.
- CEO, ZOT GGI

FAIL!

2009-01-08T01:26:00.000+08:00

2230hrs + 1hr 20min = ????

MERRY XMAS!!!!!!

2008-12-25T00:06:00.001+08:00

Why go Mambo when u have IRC?

Rem to hang your socks if u want a chai for Xmas.

Kerk Not Dead

2008-11-27T16:32:00.001+08:00

greetings from BANG COCKKK

Will be back on Fridayzzzz Gayzzzzz

Happy 24th Birthday Raphael!

2008-11-14T23:54:00.002+08:00

how can we let yuda's birthday pass without wishing him happy birthday?

Here's a Happy and Blessed year ahead my friend!

(sorry for cannibalising ur post, foong... my avatar owns anyway :))

Keeping the Site Alive

2008-11-13T03:04:00.001+08:00

Guess which is who and who has the most saggf and gayest avatar. T_T

all avatars created by their own respective persons.

Clan /S Has Come A Long Way

2008-10-29T13:14:00.003+08:00

Tag Team Champions of The Worlddddddddd~~~~~~

Blondes have more fun

2008-10-04T00:46:00.004+08:00

Life and How to Survive It

2008-09-08T16:08:00.000+08:00

Stole this post from a blog entry that was forwarded to me. think its really interesting and a great read. =) enjoy!

Adrian Tan, a litigator from Drew & Napier and author of "The Teenage Textbook".

"Life and How to Survive It"
I must say thank you to the faculty and staff of the Wee Kim Wee School of Communication and Information for inviting me to give your convocation address. It's a wonderful honour and a privilege for me to speak here for ten minutes without fear of contradiction, defamation or retaliation. I say this as a Singaporean and more so as a husband.

My wife is a wonderful person and perfect in every way except one. She is the editor of a magazine. She corrects people for a living. She has honed her expert skills over a quarter of a century, mostly by practising at home during conversations between her and me.

On the other hand, I am a litigator. Essentially, I spend my day telling people how wrong they are. I make my living being disagreeable.

Nevertheless, there is perfect harmony in our matrimonial home. That is because when an editor and a litigator have an argument, the one who triumphs is always the wife.

And so I want to start by giving one piece of advice to the men: when you've already won her heart, you don't need to win every argument.

Marriage is considered one milestone of life. Some of you may already be married. Some of you may never be married. Some of you will be married. Some of you will enjoy the experience so much, you will be married many, many times. Good for you.

The next big milestone in your life is today: your graduation. The end of education. You're done learning.

You've probably been told the big lie that "Learning is a lifelong process" and that therefore you will continue studying and taking masters' degrees and doctorates and professorships and so on. You know the sort of people who tell you that? Teachers. Don't you think there is some measure of conflict of interest? They are in the business of learning, after all. Where would they be without you? They need you to be repeat customers.

The good news is that they're wrong.

The bad news is that you don't need further education because your entire life is over. It is gone. That may come as a shock to some of you. You're in your teens or early twenties. People may tell you that you will live to be 70, 80, 90 years old. That is your life expectancy.

I love that term: life expectancy. We all understand the term to mean the average life span of a group of people. But I'm here to talk about a bigger idea, which is what you expect from your life.

You may be very happy to know that Singapore is currently ranked as the country with the third highest life expectancy. We are behind Andorra and Japan, and tied with San Marino. It seems quite clear why people in those countries, and ours, live so long. We share one thing in common: our football teams are all hopeless. There's very little danger of any of our citizens having their pulses raised by watching us play in the World Cup. Spectators are more likely to be lulled into a gentle and restful nap.

Singaporeans have a life expectancy of 81.8 years. Singapore men live to an average of 79.21 years, while Singapore women live more than five years longer, probably to take into account the additional time they need to spend in the bathroom.

So here you are, in your twenties, thinking that you'll have another 40 years to go. Four decades in which to live long and prosper.

Bad news. Read the papers. There are people dropping dead when they're 50, 40, 30 years old. Or quite possibly just after finishing their convocation. They would be very disappointed that they didn't meet their life expectancy.

I'm here to tell you this. Forget about your life expectancy.

After all, it's calculated based on an average. And you never, ever want to expect being average.

Revisit those expectations. You might be looking forward to working, falling in love, marrying, raising a family. You are told that, as graduates, you should expect to find a job paying so much, where your hours are so much, where your responsibilities are so much.

That is what is expected of you. And if you live up to it, it will be an awful waste.

If you expect that, you will be limiting yourself. You will be living your life according to boundaries set by average people. I have nothing against average people. But no one should aspire to be them. And you don't need years of education by the best minds in Singapore to prepare you to be average.

What you should prepare for is mess. Life's a mess. You are not entitled to expect anything from it. Life is not fair. Everything does not balance out in the end. Life happens, and you have no control over it. Good and bad things happen to you day by day, hour by hour, moment by moment. Your degree is a poor armour against fate.

Don't expect anything. Erase all life expectancies. Just live. Your life is over as of today. At this point in time, you have grown as tall as you will ever be, you are physically the fittest you will ever be in your entire life and you are probably looking the best that you will ever look. This is as good as it gets. It is all downhill from here. Or up. No one knows.

What does this mean for you? It is good that your life is over.

Since your life is over, you are free. Let me tell you the many wonderful things that you can do when you are free.

The most important is this: do not work.

Work is anything that you are compelled to do. By its very nature, it is undesirable.

Work kills. The Japanese have a term "Karoshi", which means death from overwork. That's the most dramatic form of how work can kill. But it can also kill you in more subtle ways. If you work, then day by day, bit by bit, your soul is chipped away, disintegrating until there's nothing left. A rock has been ground into sand and dust.

There's a common misconception that work is necessary. You will meet people working at miserable jobs. They tell you they are "making a living". No, they're not. They're dying, frittering away their fast-extinguishing lives doing things which are, at best, meaningless and, at worst, harmful.

People will tell you that work ennobles you, that work lends you a certain dignity. Work makes you free. The slogan "Arbeit macht frei" was placed at the entrances to a number of Nazi concentration camps. Utter nonsense.

Do not waste the vast majority of your life doing something you hate so that you can spend the small remainder sliver of your life in modest comfort. You may never reach that end anyway.

Resist the temptation to get a job. Instead, play. Find something you enjoy doing. Do it. Over and over again. You will become good at it for two reasons: you like it, and you do it often. Soon, that will have value in itself.

I like arguing, and I love language. So, I became a litigator. I enjoy it and I would do it for free. If I didn't do that, I would've been in some other type of work that still involved writing fiction – probably a sports journalist.

So what should you do? You will find your own niche. I don't imagine you will need to look very hard. By this time in your life, you will have a very good idea of what you will want to do. In fact, I'll go further and say the ideal situation would be that you will not be able to stop yourself pursuing your passions. By this time you should know what your obsessions are. If you enjoy showing off your knowledge and feeling superior, you might become a teacher.

Find that pursuit that will energise you, consume you, become an obsession. Each day, you must rise with a restless enthusiasm. If you don't, you are working.

Most of you will end up in activities which involve communication. To those of you I have a second message: be wary of the truth. I'm not asking you to speak it, or write it, for there are times when it is dangerous or impossible to do those things. The truth has a great capacity to offend and injure, and you will find that the closer you are to someone, the more care you must take to disguise or even conceal the truth. Often, there is great virtue in being evasive, or equivocating. There is also great skill. Any child can blurt out the truth, without thought to the consequences. It takes great maturity to appreciate the value of silence.

In order to be wary of the truth, you must first know it. That requires great frankness to yourself. Never fool the person in the mirror.

I have told you that your life is over, that you should not work, and that you should avoid telling the truth. I now say this to you: be hated.

It's not as easy as it sounds. Do you know anyone who hates you? Yet every great figure who has contributed to the human race has been hated, not just by one person, but often by a great many. That hatred is so strong it has caused those great figures to be shunned, abused, murdered and in one famous instance, nailed to a cross.

One does not have to be evil to be hated. In fact, it's often the case that one is hated precisely because one is trying to do right by one's own convictions. It is far too easy to be liked, one merely has to be accommodating and hold no strong convictions. Then one will gravitate towards the centre and settle into the average. That cannot be your role. There are a great many bad people in the world, and if you are not offending them, you must be bad yourself. Popularity is a sure sign that you are doing something wrong.

The other side of the coin is this: fall in love.

I didn't say "be loved". That requires too much compromise. If one changes one's looks, personality and values, one can be loved by anyone.

Rather, I exhort you to love another human being. It may seem odd for me to tell you this. You may expect it to happen naturally, without deliberation. That is false. Modern society is anti-love. We've taken a microscope to everyone to bring out their flaws and shortcomings. It far easier to find a reason not to love someone, than otherwise. Rejection requires only one reason. Love requires complete acceptance. It is hard work – the only kind of work that I find palatable.

Loving someone has great benefits. There is admiration, learning, attraction and something which, for the want of a better word, we call happiness. In loving someone, we become inspired to better ourselves in every way. We learn the truth worthlessness of material things. We celebrate being human. Loving is good for the soul.

Loving someone is therefore very important, and it is also important to choose the right person. Despite popular culture, love doesn't happen by chance, at first sight, across a crowded dance floor. It grows slowly, sinking roots first before branching and blossoming. It is not a silly weed, but a mighty tree that weathers every storm.

You will find, that when you have someone to love, that the face is less important than the brain, and the body is less important than the heart.

You will also find that it is no great tragedy if your love is not reciprocated. You are not doing it to be loved back. Its value is to inspire you.

Finally, you will find that there is no half-measure when it comes to loving someone. You either don't, or you do with every cell in your body, completely and utterly, without reservation or apology. It consumes you, and you are reborn, all the better for it.

Don't work. Avoid telling the truth. Be hated. Love someone.

You're going to have a busy life. Thank goodness there's no life expectancy.

24th bday at the halo.

2008-08-23T19:09:00.006+08:00

we are old. T_T.

sad.

next time 1 candle enuff plz thanks.

anyway it was emo "WTF WHY GOT NEYO SONG" niteee

and the very belated rendition of "LI EH LI EH"

here's the fotos.

group foto.

az being himself.

sim + smu combine forces.

last but not least, the musketeers in action once again.
angsty yd
fetish for foong john
and
very very gay foong

spanks for the gift and the dinner. it was real great fun =)

zzzzzz

2008-08-18T17:38:00.004+08:00

Back to School

Time to SAGGF

/S 9th Anniversary

2008-07-25T17:45:00.003+08:00

1st ever /S Anniversary but the stories told remains the same.....

TOO EASY!!

ITTT HARDDD aka FAIL!

SIM guys r always shag

BUT NUS guys r SHAGGER!

Message From The Chieftain

2008-07-05T00:32:00.003+08:00

This is an IMPORTANT announcement.
All Wankers ARE to log into Bnet at least ONCE in 28 days.

Failure to comply will result in death by a thousand snakes.

John's Official Inauguration

2008-06-05T17:50:00.003+08:00

CLAN WANK FOR THE WIN!

Wankerboys Are Back In Townnnnnn

2008-05-20T02:57:00.003+08:00

W.A.N.K
a group of wankers, the best of wankers, forever and always.

Team /S Caps Revival With Winning Start

2008-05-16T01:46:00.003+08:00

Team /S 5 - 4 Team PTIs
(Brendon 3, Francis 2)

Since noone's bothered to write the report, and since I'm free, I shall be nice as usual and do the report.

So, after 6 months of inactivity, /S regrouped for a game last Sunday at Queensway Secondary. With the whole team suffering from a lack of match fitness, plus half the team suffering from hangovers, it wasn't exactly a comfort when we found out that our opponents were all PTIs.

The PTI's immediately proved that they were indeed, men from the Singapore army when they decided to take their pre-match pictures only after the referee came half an hour late when they had all the time in the world to do it before.

Anyways, the lack of match fitness plus the Henessey from the night before quickly claimed John as the first casualty about 30 minutes into the game. The team as a whole was sluggish and considering the line-up, it should have been a pretty easy game.

First blood went to the PTIs, although I cannot remember how they scored. /S equalised almost immediately when from a sick Lionel long throw that sailed over the entire defence and Brendon headed home. (he cannot throw one, our captain claims to have heard from the PTIs)

The PTIs hit back in the second half when a corner kick evaded everybody and someone was there to finish. But all the goal did was to wake /S up as they responded with 3 goals in quick succession, 2 from Francis and 1 from Brendon. 4-2!

With the game seemingly settled, /S turned sluggish and Kerk lost out to the PTI striker for a high ball and ended up with his neck pinned against the post crying out 'REF REF REF!' helplessly. The referee was unmoved. 4-3!

A long ball then bounced infront of Kerk while he was looking to the heavens and praying 'bu yao jing bu yao jing'. His prayers worked, as the ball hit the crossbar, but only for the PTI striker to put the rebound in. 4-4. Was the game turning into Korean Nightmare part 2?

The answer was NO . Brendon secured the victory and his hat-trick by scoring straight from the resulting kickoff. 5-4, and that was that.

A victory for /S first game since November.

Good ol' Days =)

2008-05-09T17:21:00.005+08:00

No Emo Black Fingernails....Just Blue Hair

No SAGGF/ZOT GGI...just ORDed/Haven't ORDed

No See How See How....Just Super Suppz ONG

No Act Homan....ONLY REAL HOMAN

Guess Who Has Been Lifing?

2008-04-26T21:04:00.004+08:00

Our captain is very competitive! ^^

MISSING!

2008-04-22T15:22:00.003+08:00

Kerk Kai Kai

Escaped from SIM. Last seen having supper at 4am.

Walks with a limp on all 3 legs. Centre leg due to exhaustion.

Hairy ass.

If YOU see him. Please Call 1800-insane-saviours.

We WILL rescue him.

asics sale

2008-04-03T01:57:00.006+08:00

oh, and dont ever get this drunk ;)

Happy Early Bday JOHN!!!!!

2008-03-31T01:52:00.009+08:00

The New TMNTs

I WILL SAGGF

Offical /S Merchandise: Braun Buffel

Nicer than Seah's Cake ^^

"We should have gone dbl o" T_T

Loveee is in the airrrrrrrr.........

Happy Valley.......NOT!

More Biz....More Luck!

The Face Trap

2008-03-27T22:59:00.003+08:00

the legendary skill is no longer exclusive to jy

the great rockband concert part II

2008-03-23T23:51:00.004+08:00

ah... t'was a silent nite..

till we opened shop at weikin's for the great rockband concert part II

oh yea. it was weikin's birthday too!

happy belated bday wk. =P

Kerk at his best =)

Super yummy cake omg.

Group pic. (after 4 unsuccessful attempts)

Ky with some shutter pheonomenon.

Presenting the birthday gift.

Some randomness.

Thought of the Day

2008-03-23T13:22:00.001+08:00

i still love you ky. =)

/S NAHER Awards 2008

2008-03-09T15:41:00.007+08:00

Click on it for clearer view ^^

Team /S 4(Trav x 3,Ky) Team Refugees 1

2008-02-19T10:45:00.003+08:00

Inspired by a rampant Man Utd the previous night, Team /S stormed to an awesome victory over Team Refugees.

The odds were against us as we only had 11 players which meant that we didn't have any substitutes and since the 11 comprised of Jy and Kerk, it meant that there were plenty of doubts as to whether we would be able to finish with 11 players.

Kerk started in goal and Nicholas from NUS made his debut for /S on the leftback position. The first goal was scored by Travers when a throw-in from the right was not properly cleared by the opposition defence. Ky (or somebody) flicked the ball on and Travers put the ball into the net at the near post position with a one touch volley.

The second goal was a header(i think) from Travers amidst a defence all out at sea. Ky appeared to have the final touch, but the goal was accredited to Travers. 1st half ended at 2-0 to /S with Kerk keeping yet another one-half clean sheet thanks to the defence in front of him with the ever-solid Yoons making many a defensive header.

2nd half started with Les in goal as Kerk took over as rightback. A lesson was learnt the hardway for Capt Foo as with Kerk and Jy on the same flank, Yuda had to cover for them all the time against the likes of Victor from the Refugees.

A one-two from the opposition players found one of them almost through on goal with John chasing him, but miscommunication from John and Les allowed him to calmly stroke the ball into the goal. 2-1, game on.

Team Refugees started to put more pressure on /S as they sought for the equaliser, but Chengwei continued to show his party tricks even though there wasn't really any audience.

The ref told us that it was fulltime, but we decided to play 5 more mins to make it more exciting.
Cue mayhem as Travers completed his hattrick from a freekick that floated over the keeper. Ky got his name on the scoresheet following a cutback from Brendon.

A late rout and Team /S successfully had their revenge for a previous defeat the Refugees inflicted over a much-depleted Team /S.

Uncle John's Fridge

2008-02-14T12:31:00.002+08:00

good as gold, around the world...

The Great /S Chalet 2008!

2008-01-17T12:57:00.001+08:00

GET SMASHED OR GET BASHED!!!!

1st Feb - 3rd Feb

@Downtown East

HAPPY BIRTHDAY KY!!!!

2008-01-12T23:45:00.000+08:00

I knew i should have thrown that cap away...budden ar...it's nv too late

Have a great year ahead!!! Life will nv be the same again dear donatello =)

Happy New Year!!!!

2008-01-01T16:38:00.000+08:00

The Great /S Challenge

/S Pic Of The Year Nominee #1

/S Pic Of The Year Nominee #2

"Welcome to Homan Homan Club" CEO, Homan Homan Club Singapore, Mr Chong

My Chemical Romance Concert

Megadeth Concert

Fantastic new year's eve once again thx to lester!!! SAGGF = SAGGF + 1 (ky infected by 'kat's breath)

Entire collection of photos from hy's camera can be d/ed here: http://download.yousendit.com/859C15215E9D1625

Happy Birthday Mr A to the Z!

2007-12-27T01:07:00.000+08:00

Stay away!

The cake is all mine!!!

Happy Birthday Da Jie!

2007-12-26T23:36:00.000+08:00

Happy Birthday to our favourite Da Jie!!!

Merry Christmas!

2007-12-25T13:58:00.001+08:00

from Jakarta with love...

Anybody Home?

2007-12-22T15:08:00.001+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DENNIS!!!!

2007-12-07T12:28:00.001+08:00

Best Wishes!!!

The best Street Fighter in /S!!!!!

Hmmm...

2007-12-05T01:31:00.000+08:00

the return of owtze.jpg

Israeli Stars Back In Action!

2007-11-18T22:30:00.002+08:00

Team /S 3 (cw x2, vincent) - 2 Team 96

Tal Les Haim

Yossi Benafoong

Tal Les Haim's return match looked likely to be canceled as his international team-mate Benafoong tabooed the weather. Team /S went into the match barely prepared as players have just arrived and have yet to carry out any warm-up...a typical lao-jiao team-to-be...

The first half looked like it was destined for a clear-cut /S victory as Team /S controlled large parts off the game, scoring the first goal from a delightful through ball from ky, finding cw who chips the ball ever so coolly over the keeper and into the back of the net! 1-0! This was followed quickly by the 2nd goal as Foong made a trademark run down the right flank and decided not to cross after all that effort. Instead, he passed back to yd who got down the side of the 6-yard box, put a low cross across goal...Les Haim flicked it on...and Vincent made no mistakes! 2-0! Team 96 were limited to aimless shots from outside the box and failed to get any grip on the game. Half-Time.

Just when everyone thought it was going to be an easy day out, Team /S got the shock of their lives as a defensive error gave Team 96 Diego Maradona-Shaped striker a chance to volley the ball into the back of the net! 2-1.

Team /S had several opportunities to kill the game off on the counter but failed to capitalize and indeed, they were finally punished when a corner was handled by William in the box. Penalty. Team 96 GK slotted the penalty straight into the middle as Dan can only look on helplessly. 2-2. =(

A reply almost came immediately as a well-worked one-two between William and yd put yd through on goal....puts the ball across goal...only for Vincent to miss the ball from point blank range. Team /S continued to press on and it finally paid off when a through ball from ky once again found William who puts the ball to cw...slotting the ball into an empty net! 3-2! Finishing up the game in style...Team 96 smashed a direct freekick outside the box straight onto the crossbar rattling the /S faithfuls' hearts. But in the end, the better team came out on top! Team /S!! Unbeaten since God knows when already!

Sorry foong u look pretty gg....but then again....Benayoun IS pretty gg.... =(

Happy Birthday Yuda!

2007-11-12T00:00:00.001+08:00

Yuda's birthday bbq at everyone's fav bbq location! Some pictures since I know no-one will bother to up them.. =)

the star of the night

XIANG BEI SHENG LI~!!

my chemical kerk

dennis the rockstar

something's not right..

yea.. better T_T

everything a man could want ^^

sign the form!!!

cutting cakes gives yd an orgasm

happy birthday yd!

another successful bbq by /S!!

Mega Day!

2007-11-05T14:08:00.000+08:00

Kerk u sug =(

Double Kill

2007-10-29T21:56:00.001+08:00

jx: not spared from the power of the M

The Revenge of Guile

2007-10-25T01:25:00.000+08:00

ayer rajah brudder M-ed, foong is next...

Spot The Difference

2007-10-23T00:25:00.001+08:00

DA XING XING!!!!!

TMNT Curse BROKEN!!!!

2007-10-17T15:53:00.000+08:00

Congratulations to Leonardo!
By SAGGFing before 12 Nov, he gets to SAGGF with a HUI!!
SO HURRY UP U ZOT GGIs BEFORE THERE ARE NO MORE HUIs AROUND!!!!
WHILE STOCKS LAST!!!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MR GOH!!!!!

2007-10-12T15:40:00.001+08:00

BEST WISHES!!!!
CYA IN SG SOON!!!!!!!!!!

DREAM THEATER!!!!

2007-10-05T02:13:00.000+08:00

Progressive Metal maestros DREAM THEATER bring their CHAOS IN MOTION WORLD TOUR to Singapore on Thursday, Jan 17, 2008. Tickets will go onsale at Sistic on October 8th!

Team /S 4 (Chengwei, o.g, Choo, Kerk) Team Grey 2

2007-09-23T19:13:00.000+08:00

The pitch that greeted Team /S was a grim sight. It was covered mostly with sand rather than grass. But having played on worse pitches before (Meridian JC!!), we knew what to expect.

Captain Foo decided on a masterplan of 3-5-2, as much due to tactical reasons as to the players available to us. First goal was a result of a skillful dribble from Chengwei, leading to a 1v1 situation with the opposition keeper. Chengwei easily frags the keeper and passes the ball into net. 1-0!!

Choo crosses from the right and a defender from Team Gray puts the ball past his own keeper!! Sibei Kelong!!! 2-0 to Team /S!!

First half ended with a 2-0 comfortable scoreline. 2nd half started and Team Gray stepped up a gear to put pressure on Kerk's goal. A few corners and a couple of off-target shots were a warning sign of Team Grey's intentions.

A counter attack from Team Grey leads to John and Ky having a mixup in defence. The opposition player gets into the penalty box as Kingyau closes him down but gets away with a shot. 2-1 as Kerk fails to cover his near post.

Shortly after, a freekick by Team /S was not cleanly caught by their keeper and Choo pounced on the rebound to restore our 2 goal lead. 3-1!!

Choo goes into goal and Kerk goes outfield. Kingyau crosses from the left on a breakaway and the ball just goes behind an onrushing Kristanto. Kerk however is there to take a shot and the defender only managed to deflect the ball into the goal. 4-1!!

Team Grey takes a freekick and it eludes a busload of players in the six-yard box and goes straight into goal. 4-2.

With only 5 minutes left, Team /S failed to utilise any of their 3 centre midfielders as the ball goes sailing in the air time after time from defence into attack. The whistle goes and Team /S secures a 4-2 victory.

The New Urban Male

2007-09-17T22:05:00.000+08:00

finally, irrefutable proof that ky is gay...

Happy 23rd Birthday Ferk! (Foong + Kerk)

2007-09-10T20:31:00.000+08:00

the birthday gathering was totally Ferked up!

i'll let the pictures do the talking...

foong finds his true love...

happy birthday to us~

kerk caresses foong's hand while pretending to cut the cake

dennis can't bear to watch / 'ni kan bu dao wo!' / hiro nakamura stops time

Group photo!

chia brudders

foong is a happy man after being given a members' card and FREE BEER

Cheers!